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Monday, March 3, 2014

Becoming Sister Lambson, Part 4

And then, the waiting.

Every Friday at EFY there is a dance. I expected him to talk to me or dance with me or at least look at me during the dance, but he didn't.

Oh no, I've ruined everything.

After the dance there is a big, final fireside. Brother West was the session director that week and I'm sure he gave a really great final fireside, but I missed it because the entire time he was speaking I was sitting there praying.

Heavenly Father. I did what I felt impressed to do. I KNOW that that was a feeling from Thee that I was supposed to tell him how I felt, but now he's avoiding me and I don't understand. But I trust Thy plan. Maybe it was practice for some other guy sometime in the future, but please help me to know that everything is okay. 

After the fireside I took my little group of youth to a private area to give them my parting words. When the testimonies had been shared and all my hopes for their future had been given, they all lined up two by two to walk back to the dorms and go to bed. My co-counselor lead in front and I brought up the rear, and as we filed out a strong arm came around my shoulders and Benji started to walk with me. I felt so strongly in my heart the answer to my prayer that everything would be okay.

We only walked about 20 feet together and I asked him when he would leave Provo for his Mexico trip. He replied that he was leaving as soon as all the youth were in bed that night. We came to the curb and he stopped and I kept walking behind my group. On a whim I turned around and ran back to him and threw my arms around his neck.

Maybe we would never talk again.

Maybe he would never like me and was just being friendly.

Maybe I had ruined everything.

But right then, I knew everything would be okay.

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